Don't Let The Sun Go Down.....

I am sure the majority of my readers have heard the scripture I am referring to in the title. This verse is found at Ephesians 4:26 and reads:

"In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." NIV

Clarification! It does not tell us to not get angry. We all get angry. In fact, I used to be a very angry person. Just ask some of the people who knew me in my early 20's. I probably wasn't even pleasant to be around because I carried wounds and didn't let them go. It made me an extremely angry and bitter person. When I self reflect I can see how I have changed that and how far I have come.

See, when Jesus tells us to forgive others, it is not even necessarily for their good, but for ours. The reason we hold onto anger is because it makes us feel more in control of the situation. Also, there are instances in which we feel they do not even deserve forgiveness so we withhold it. In my circumstance, I stayed angry to keep myself safe from more hurt and disappointment. When someone has gone through hell in their life or has been hurt multiple times it causes distrust, nightmares, physical flash backs and many other repercussions. Life has a weird way of creeping up on us too. Those memories that were once so vivid can fade into the past, and then one day just blow up in our faces. Small triggers can turn a small situation into something very large, as I have been experiencing as of late. It is no fun and this scripture has been coming to my mind.

You see, I have sinned in my anger. I have taken my anger out on people who don't even deserve it. My husband is usually the brunt of it and sometimes I get really impatient with Benjamin, which is totally unfair. With my miscarriage I was angry at everyone it felt like, even though it is no one's fault, not even my own, that I lost my baby. I have struggled with anger towards God because he should be able to control all these situations.

But to turn and trust God and follow 1 Peter 5:7 which says:

"Cast your cares upon the Lord, for he cares about you." 

can be the hardest thing to do, especially for me. I am a person who likes to take control and make sure everything runs smoothly. When that doesn't happen, I get extremely agitated and yes, angry. Despite this, I have to remember with whom I place my trust. God is the only one who has brought me out of my anger issues and healed my broken heart. It is only through him that true freedom has been acquired.

Now, I have been trying to control my anger and my tongue, which has not been easy. But my life is more at peace. Forgiving certain people has set me free, not them. It has given me the peace that transcends all understanding. This peace I had no idea existed until I started wholly trusting in my Savior. We weren't meant to walk this life alone; we were created to walk with God. So if you are struggling in some area, remember:

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10